Joy in the Turmoil

It has been a long while since I've written one of these things, and I barely know where to start.

To be honest, I really, really wanted to make this blog bright eyed and bushy tailed… Don’t get me wrong, God is SO faithful; he is still on the throne, he loves us STILL. I am just in the midst of one “those” seasons.  The training season…. Oh the seasons of growing pains and jumping into the deep end! There has been NO shortage of tears, heart ache, and just simple loneliness these past 6 months.

I could sit here and tell you all about the heart ache, and the trials, and how hard my season was.  BUT, that is not who I WANT to be. Sure, the dramatic diva in me wants to throw all my turmoil on the table and tell you all about every bump, and bruise, and stolen moment. BUT, BUT, BUT GOD! 

Nope, this season God has physically showed up in my sobbing on the floor I can’t see tomorrow moments. This season, Daddy God has pushed me into a deeper revelation of his love, a deeper understanding of what kingdom justice looks like. This season I have learned how to trust him with everything inside of me for strength tomorrow. This season I have learned how important it is to CHOOSE to come in the opposite spirit when everything else around you screams just to sit down and not fight the good fight. In this season I learned that even on my worst days God continued to whisper truth that shook my core back to his beautiful gaze.  

The turmoil in my “rough” season will NEVER add up the “rough” day Jesus took for me on that cross. My “roughest” day will never compare to the little girl locked in the room that I pass every day, or the precious child in Syria who is fleeing from chemical weapons….  My “roughest” season is never an easy way out to toss up the white flag and walk away… 

Every season of joy, loneliness, or uncharted waters is a season that was pre destined before for the foundations of the earth! God never wonders away, he never lets his gaze leave us for a second…  Even in the midst of my rough season, God never, ever left me side. God brought me to this season for the plans that he has placed deep in my heart, he just needs to reveal a little more of himself through turmoil, through the pain, through the unknown…. 

The girl I WANT to be is a girl who wakes up to find the glory in EACH day. The girl I want to be is the girl who will continue to fight and learn even in the rough season. The girl I want to be is thankful that the God of the universe is constantly reminding me of who He is, and how He reaches down to me, this little soul that so easily finds turmoil in the seemingly "tough" times.  The girl I want to be, the girl I AM, will rejoice and be glad in every day, every season, and will fight for justice and freedom, always!

 So, here is to closing the chapter of this season and leaving Africa sooner than expected. As much as I hate good buys and puffy red faces, God is calling me home for a season of rest and healing…  I will be heading home September 13, and YES this was not the plan, BUT it’s HIS will, HIS plans, HIS kingdom… There are plans in the work to hit the ground running again mid December/January!

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

^16-18 So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever

One day at a time.

This is the truth. I have the freedom, the opportunity to do something about it. The truth is that HE loves these children just as much as HE loves me and now that I know, I am responsible. - Katie Davis

I can't just walk into a village and tell a child that Jesus loves them. For they can not comprehend love, for chances are they have never ever been loved. I have to feed them, clothe them, care for them, and love her SO unconditional as I tell them that I love you. Once they SEE love and can understand and see my love, I can begin to tell her about a Savior who love them EVEN more. 

That is the truth for these babies. That they know they are worth being cared for, that they are worthy of being loved.. The truth is that their Savior has a plan and a never ending hope for them that is NO where near the label orphan...  That is a beautiful truth. 

This is my mission. That beautiful truth is what gets me up in the morning. That is the path I am choosing to stand up for. To give love. Choose love. Be love. Those 164.8 MILLION children deserve to be showed their value. Low and Slow. One hug. One kiss. One bowl of a rice a day. One child walking out of slavery a day. 

At the end of March I will be heading back to Africa, on a one way ticket, and working with Justice Rising. I will be serving the Lord through projects that are working to rebuild a community in love and see an END to Sex trafficking in this community! The Lord crossed his arms in faith for me - it's now my time to step up and fight for these treasures. 

Will you take the risk with me? Will you choose love everyday? Will you fight for the dreams the lord has placed inside you?

Will you take a leap of faith and just pray with the Lord and see if you are being lead to support me monthly, EVERY penny counts. This will cover all of my expenses from food,water,rent, transportation, to feeding the hungry... 

If so you can send your tax deductible donation to:
War Cry Prayer Ministries, Inc
3310 Mountain View
Venus, TX 76084

Write 'Breanne' in the memo field / 100% of your donation comes to me! 

Thank you for believing in me.... for seeing my heart. 

Awake our Soul

Then He said to me,

Prophesy to these bones and say to them,
Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord!
This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones,
I will make breath enter you,
And you will come to life.
So I prophesied as I was commanded.
As I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound,
And the bones came together, bone to bone.
And I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them,
And skin covered them, but there was no breath in them.
Then He said to me,
Prophesy to the breath,
Prophesy, son of man, and say to it,
Conjure the four winds of breath and breathe.
Awake my Soul — Chris Tomlin/Lecrae

The shootings. Guns. Abortions. Hatred. Murders. Sin. The lies. Drugs. Homelessness. Lack of God. Sickness. Fear.

This is America, where freedom rings. We have so much to be thankful for. We have everything here, yet when you watch the news and read the Facebook statuses, it’s all poor me, help me, SIN, fear, it’s a fallen world. People seem to care more about what the next trends are and the biggest and best gun to be bought before Obama bans them. We don’t see people in America.  We see ourselves, we want the American dream with the cars, the house, the perfect children. We want it all…

I don’t like America. I want to like America, I want to like the white people, I really do. I keep hearing the Lord say “GRACE, baby girl, love them, teach them”…. I don’t know how to extend grace to people who have everything and yet when they look at their lives they see nothing. I want America to WAKE UP. We have SO much here, so much that we should be a living example of heaven! If we  only cared as much about our children’s education and as we did about Obama banning guns or better yet, if we cared about our relationship with the Lord, America would be such a different place!

America is not dead, we have a fighting chance here, we have hope. We have more churches on every corner then we even know what to do with. Can you imagine America if we all stopped and just prayed? Really think about it.  If we all came together and worshiped our Lord, sat at his feet and tossed our crowns down… AH! what a glorious moment that would be! America can conquer sin.  I mean shoot, Jesus did the hard part people!  If we would just stop for Him and do what He is asking, if we would stop for each other and see the best in people, if we chose to love, if we lived and breathed His words that He put on this earth so you and I could live this world for HIM!

As I sit here in tears, I need to choose to love America. I can not throw it away and just move to Africa. I am just as much called here as I’m called to Africa. I need to choose grace on His people, I need to love the unlovable, I need to choose to love His people who do not yet know the love of the Lord. If I can have hope for a place where Jesus is not even known, I can and WILL love America.

— JESUS, help me. Help us. Come down this week and lavish your precious love on America. Wake your people up God. Encounter them so they have no choice but to bow at your feet. We owe you everything God, you deserve America to look up at you in love. Help our unbelief, you make ALL things work for your good, ALL things. Help me learn how to love your people here, to love them like you. I believe America will one day be yours again, not just pieces of it, but all of it. This is my cry God… To see this place be yours, to love your people, to show grace when you ask me to! Forgive us Father for not turning to you. We need you. We love you. We want you here! I love you papa, thank you God for saving me!

Bella House

I had the honor to visit Bella house, a Rescue and Rehabilitation home for child prostitutes and sex-trafficked victims in Kenya, Africa. There are currently 5 girls living at Bella House, ranging from age 8 to 20. These precious baby girls all have stories that are straight from hell, stories of being sold and tossed to the side by countless men every single night. Stories that make you lose your breath and make the magic carpet come right out from under your feet. I am not allowed to go into their specifics stories, for one they are not mine to tell, and their stories do NOT define them! For when you look in their beautiful eyes you see the glory of the Lord and more hope than you could ever imagine. They have faith that can move mountains, and set captives free, and I can say that I got to spend 3 glorious weeks filled with love, laughter, and SO much joy.

These girls have more joy than you can even believe, Bella House is a house full of FUN!  They start off the morning with family time and we got to worship the lord at the top of our lungs and every day the girls would thank the lord over and over and over again that they get to be like Queen Esther now. I really hope that people understand, those girls have been at Bella House only 3 months, and they are laid down lovers of the lord already! They went from hell … To living a life where they walk around the house praying, where they want to worship and dance before the lord, where they want to read the word and sleep with the bible at night. They have more faith than you and I can even begin to even imagine!

They captured my heart, forever. Those babies are what I call VICTORY. They are daughters of the lord and are not afraid to call it out… They are living in a house where they get told every second how loved they are, they know who their Father is, and they know when they lay their head down at night God is protecting them. They taught ME love, and hope… They taught me to overcome my past and to live my life with passion. My Bella House Princess’ changed my perspective on life, and I am forever honored that I got to meet these world changers.

They set a fire in my soul to help fight this battle of sex trafficking. .  I was amazed at how many girls are pimped out or how many feel forced to go out based on their circumstances.  Little princess’ who are being prostituted out, sold for sex to men who don’t even ask them their name. I mean in this village there are hundreds of girls out there stuck in hell. My eyes are opened, the lord would whisper dreams and hopes of the little girls I would see, and even though their lifeless faces would just stare straight into my eyes, their tears would fall at my feet, I saw their life beyond the next man! The lord allowed me in that moment to speak life into them, and just love them. But, that is not enough. YES, I am called to love them, but the lord is calling me higher, he is calling me to Kenya. He has shown me little girl’s faces that are going to be mine, brothels that will be turned upside down and used for his glory, this village will be his again! My heart is captured for this place, and ready to see an end to sex trafficking and child prostitution… I have faith that Father God is bigger than hell, amen, I have faith that God is calling me to here to not just make a difference but SEE the difference! Slavery, sex trafficking, hell on earth, WILL be stopped in the name of Jesus; Bella House is just the begging in this village! 

Extravagant Love

Increasing the love in our hearts is just as miraculous as raising the dead. It requires just as much Holy Spirit. 

-Rolland Baker on the miracle of love

     As I have had time to stop and reflect on Harvest School and Kenya, my mind just bursts. I can't seem to put into words what my life has become and what I learned in this special honeymoon season I had with the lord! I learned to stop just talking about him like he wasn't in the room, but I learned that I can see him, I can feel him. That we sing right to him! We can talk straight to his ear!! It's the basic foundation people, but with out that our faith is crumbles at the bottom of the table. Come one somebody! 

I am changed. I am healed. I am loved. I am a daughter of the Kings of Kings. 



Extravagant love.

            The fact that our Jesus left heaven. He left heaven where streets are lined with Gold, where he was sitting in the throne room with his father, to come walk the streets of dirt... He left it all to do his Fathers will. He was willing to surrender all his riches to come and lay on a cross for you and I, and he was JOYFUL in it all!!! If we could stop and understand that we don't get the right to complain when the lord ask us to lay down our lives to serve him, come on somebody, that's what he did for us. That is extravagant love, the way he loves us endlessly. The way we get to love him back in joy and honor for a man who laid down his life so we get to wake up and breath his glory. Extravagant love. 
             We are love. Our identity is love.  He created us to love and be loved. Love is not complicated. Love is giving it all up, laying it all down at his feet. Love is always know that at the end of the day we are seen. Love is knowing that we are a voice to him. Love is taking his hand and knowing that he is going to lead you to every divine appointment. Love is getting everything we need from the best dad in the whole world and never deserving a penny of it. Love is dying a hell of a death and then raising up on the 3rd day just so we could live a life of love and hope. Love is calling me out of the dirt and making me a princess. Love is never being an orphan. Extravagant love. Glory. Hope. Forever. Never ending. New wine. Laughter. Extravagant love is FUN. Our Papa is FUN. 

I know that I am loved beyond a shadow of a doubt! I know that in my secret place, when I close my eyes I can see Papa God.  I am hungry, and never ending pit of hope and want for his words. My cry is to serve my God and follow his will. To walk away from it all, throw my crown at his feet and worship him. That is my heart, to love him with all of me. I am HIS. This is not my life to live but HIS. All the GLORY in his precious name. 


            

Psalm 63

A psalm of David. When he was in the Desert of Judah.

You, God, are my God,

    earnestly I seek you;

I thirst for you,

    my whole being longs for you,

in a dry and parched land

    where there is no water.

I have seen you in the sanctuary

    and beheld your power and your glory.

 

Because your love is better than life,

    my lips will glorify you.

 

I will praise you as long as I live,

    and in your name I will lift up my hands.

 

I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods;

    with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

On my bed I remember you;

    I think of you through the watches of the night.

 

Because you are my help,

    I sing in the shadow of your wings.

 

I cling to you;

    your right hand upholds me.

Those who want to kill me will be destroyed;

    they will go down to the depths of the earth.

 

They will be given over to the sword

    and become food for jackals.

But the king will rejoice in God;

    all who swear by God will glory in him,

    while the mouths of liars will be silenced.